You deserve to have the life you desire.
We all struggle at times with feelings of not being enough. For gay men there is often the added layer of expectations and messages we get from our families, society, and others that can reinforce that message. We do not have to embody those messages. We get to write our own story.
Our past informs who we are, but doesn’t define who we are.
We do the best we can given the resources we have. We develop coping strategies, ways of seeing ourselves, and ways of being in the world that work for us at a certain time in our lives, but sometimes we continue to use them when we no longer need them. These things aren’t something that is wrong or bad about us. They are simply ways of thinking or being that need to be updated or replaced.
HAVING HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHERS STARTS WITH HAVING A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH OURSELVES
A wise philosopher once said...
“If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?”
The wisdom in this isn’t to be found in a puppy, romcom kind of love. Loving ourselves in a way that transforms our relationships means relating to ourselves like a cherished and lifelong friend.
We have everything we need to live the lives we desire.
You have incredible strength and resilience that have brought you to this moment. What has led you to reading this might be a sense that you want something more or different for yourself. That discomfort usually doesn’t feel great, but it is wisdom and integrity at work and by listening to it you are well on your way to having the life you desire.
We all have something unique and wonderful to add to the world and connecting with that is pure joy.
I know this to be true because I live it through this work. My mission is to support you so that you can have the life you want. As a therapist and coach I can partner with you in a variety of ways to make this a reality.
Barry Shaeffer, LCSW
I have trained extensively in LGBTQ affirmative therapy, and I am a Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator – Candidate of Brené Brown’s work.
Coaching for Gay Men
Create the present and future you want by getting clear on what’s most important to you. We can co-create the steps to get you there.
Develop a clearer perspective on your past, cultivate self-worth, deepen your understanding of yourself, and create healthier relationships.